Some inspiration rests solely in an exploration of collective human wisdom or wisdom traditions within spiritual study, and some of the fresh thinking results from a contemporary mindset of the 21st century. The overlap is found in new innovations that draw from accumulated human wisdom. The recent emergence of death doulas and end-of-life coaches is part of that innovation.

Let’s face it. Elder care isn’t ideal care. No one wants to age and die. We don’t like to hear about or see into the reality of aging, death, dying. Most of us don’t want to talk about it, much less know how to find ease in being with people who are facing the later stages of aging and death. The reality is, we have allowed medicine and politics to govern end-of-life, a sacred life event, with a bottom-line mentality. While we are facing the reality of an ageing baby boomer generation which will impact systems and economies, maybe what life is asking from us as a culture, is to wake up to the reality of our mortality and what quality-of-life means to us beyond the great saviors of medicine, politics and economies.

I just graduated from the Boulder Sacred Passage: End-of-Life Doula training this past June, a powerful, life changing course. It felt to me like each person there, came to training at that exact moment, as if pulled by an unseen force, assuring that we connected and learned from one another.  

Death literacy embraces a soulful interplay both through inspiration, exploration, and education. It embraces new forms of bringing forth the new death positive movement which includes sacred passage doulas. The intention for death literacy is to expand the conversation by being provocative using the term death literacy.

Having companioned many people as they transitioned in the last days of their lives as a soul midwife, the feel in the room was clear and instinct gnawed. Naomi, my mom, was beginning the process of her ascension and separating from this plane.

Sacred Passage End-of-Life Doula Brad Smith discusses fall and gratitude for death, and the ritual of Samhain. Creating physical space for those who have passed allows the living to offer gratitude and remembrance to our ancestors.

Once we know where we are going, we take an honest and courageous look at our life as it stands now in relation to this complete future reality. In my case, the two never lined up verbatim, giving me opportunity for growth and work.

Is this what happens when I die when anyone dies - but in a condensed way? I’m suspecting that when I die, my “life” as defined by that which is inside my Box will be just chucked out as useless stuff - good while it was needed to live my life - but now as I die, useful? Satisfying? Who I am? 

Even in my mother’s womb, the aura of grief surrounded me.  Less than six weeks before I was born, my aunt passed away from cancer.  She was only 31 years old and left behind a grieving husband, 3 young children, her parents, and 3 siblings. I was named after her. I was born into a world of tragic loss and equal celebration of life. You see, my birth gave hope to my family. 

This is part of my story of becoming. Becoming who I am, a medicine for others to tap into and utilize. I am becoming a Sacred Passage End of Life (Death) Doula because like many reading this, I feel a pull  towards facilitating people of all ages in acknowledging their mortality to more truly live the life they desire and supporting individuals in their more immediate dying process. Beyond this, something about it simply feels “right”.