Contribution by Barbara Morningstar, who discusses her own end of life care experience and the call to become an end of life doula. “My hospice experience began when I was in my early thirties and married. On a weekly basis I would visit patients as a volunteer on the palliative unit in our local hospital. Prior to taking on this role I had never seen the physical changes in a body as someone neared death nor had I been with someone at the moment they took their last breath.“
Read MoreEnd of Life Training
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On my 71st birthday, I was struck by how the tenor of the birthday calls have changed. Many of my contemporaries are struggling with health challenges. Two friends have a terminal diagnosis and others have cancer or other significant issues. My depth of compassion is being called upon more frequently.
I am more than willing to be there for my loved ones in their darkest hours. I also know that I want to live my life with grace and optimism. The need for happiness, and its partner, laughter, must be fulfilled.
Read MoreBreaking Into Light by Tarron Estes
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Many people are mystified, shocked or “frozen” when they encounter the mysterious, subtle energy surrounding death. Nurses and caregivers helping people at tend of life might witness something mysterious or inexplicable. Based on their faith tradition, they may believe in the existence of such miracles, yet have no confidence or authority to validate the dying person’s experience. Caregivers may feel regret, guilt, shame or confusion because they denied their own beliefs and lost access to the portal of transformation that appeared for them and for the one passing.
What if a traditional, clinical education included training in how to validate and support the experiences of those who speak of traveling back and forth between this life and the next? How would this impact caregivers and their ability to serve the sick and the dying if they were introduced to the subtle energy realms listed below and allowed to express their own understanding of them?
Read MoreReclaiming All-Hallow's Eve
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My mother emigrated from Poland to America in the late 1980’s. To this day, she recalls Halloween as being one of the greatest culture shocks of her life. She would often tell me that American Halloween is empty of true meaning, that it’s hollow rather than hallow. She couldn’t wrap her mind around the idea of children running around yards filled with plastic bones, cardboard tombstones, carved pumpkins, and faux cobwebs trying to fill their pillowcases or plastic jack-o-lanterns to the rim with candy from strangers; amassing as much candy as possible has become the focal point of the holiday.
Read MoreCreating the Connection - Tarron Estes Discusses End of Life Teachings in "Art of Dying" →
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“My work is based on this principle: That when we experience care, love and healing, the nature of our heart is to give back what we have received.”
Read MorePart 4: The Vigil and Practice For Death
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Now I use this Practice for Death as a teaching tool. Through this meditation, we can learn to support each other and to begin to internalize a profound sense of surrendering into the final moments of life. Many of our graduates express that Maha Savasana: Vigil Practice for Death is one of the most transformative experiences of their certificate training.
Read MorePart 2: Occupy Death | Occupy Life: The Death Positive Movement
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For us new age boomers and spiritual seekers, this last transformational movement of Practicing for Death, is the crown jewel of how to be fully in our lives. To occupy death is to embody life. We must wake up out of whatever sleeping or waking dreams we have left, whatever dull, mind numbing trances we are still in, whatever false hope we might have that we will get out of this life without facing our own mortality and death.
Some wonder about why we should entertain such gloomy topics anyway, lest we find ourselves bogged down by this unnecessary heaviness. To them I would say that death awareness itches all the time, that it rumbles continually just under the surface, that our real choice is between letting it fester in our unconscious or leveraging it to experience feelings of meaning and deeper connection.
Read MoreTarron Estes: My Personal Evolution in the End of Life Doula Movement
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When I look back on how I came to teach “Sacred Passage: End of Life Doula” education—I see a beautiful pattern of connections and relationships, events and places. All playing unique roles. All touching. All connected. A long steady stream of connections from early childhood to now creating a beautiful life design.
I can see myself as a small child with my mother going to homes or hospital rooms of people who were sick and dying. My mom was a non-medical, natural born caregiver whose healing gifts were intact I suspect from the moment she was born. Caring was her calling.
I see my mom caring for people so tenderly, confidently and with love. Feeding sometimes. Cleaning sometimes. Sitting sometimes. Cooking. Just sitting. Wetting the mouth. Touching the forehead. Just being there.
Read MoreRites of Passage or Right to Die?: Beyond legsilation for end of life
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